The ECB: European Cluster**** of Bankers
The banks in Cyprus have been closed since March 16th, in preparation for the European Central Bank to steal a wads of cash out of the people's savings accounts and give it to the Cyprus government.
Realizing the enormity of their intended wickedness, or more likely realizing it was the popular thing to do, the Cyprus parliament voted down the heist. For now the people of Cyprus' bank accounts are hanging in the balance.
The banks are still closed and the ECB, Cyprus government and various other criminal enterprises are all trying to figure out to do with the unconscious Cypriot savings tied up in the trunk of their Chrysler Newport.
It is a magnificent paradox that could only be created by a combination of terrible leadership, fraudulent banking practices and a rarefied arrogance that might only exist in senior German government finance ministers:
You can't reopen the banks, because everyone will withdraw their money, collapsing the bank. You can't keep the banks closed, because then you've stolen everyone's money and destroyed the bank by default.
Way to go guys.
The original plan was to steal a little bit of the citizens' money to give to their fiscally incompetent leaders. All this, in hopes that giving them more of other people's money would change their reckless spending ways. It was already a bad plan.
The new deformed gargoyle of a "plan" borne out of these ugly circumstances is to "figure something else out". In the meantime, the natives are growing restless as their savings sit in limbo, possibly to be stolen, possibly not.
Far better it would have been to just take the money, and reopen the banks. At least there would have been some intellectual honesty to that, if you can somehow ignore the reverse Robin Hood action going on in broad daylight.